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The Cost of Fear

Why Most Safety Advice Is Sexist and How We Can Stop Gender-Based Violence

Author Meg Stone

Hardcover

$26.95 US

Beacon Press

6.26"W x 9.27"H x 0.86"D (15.9 x 23.5 x 2.2 cm) | 15 oz (420 g) | 12 per carton

On sale Feb 25, 2025 | 232 Pages | 9780807016220

Sales rights: World

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Nonfiction > Wellness > Self-Improvement & Inspiration

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A violence prevention expert helps targets of gender-based violence discern fact from fiction around what keeps us safe and support social change

Personal safety shouldn’t mean living in fear, nor should it come at the expense of political progress.

Questionable advice to avoid violence, like “don’t go shopping alone,” comes mostly from the police or other men in authority. But gender-based violence is often enacted in the most intimate spheres of our lives, not when we’re out grocery shopping. To stop this violence, we need strategies that are just as intimate.

In The Cost of Fear, nationally recognized violence prevention expert Meg Stone helps readers separate fact from fiction. It’s full of practical, research-based strategies that readers can use to keep themselves and their communities safer. Increased safety comes from developing the skills to resist coercive control, especially from people we know or people in authority, not from complying with rigid rules or avoiding homeless people on the street.

This deeply researched book draws timely connections between personal safety and political change—from Latina organizers in California working to stop sexual violence against night shift janitorial workers to teenage girls who call out double standards.

Work to change laws and change people’s minds is essential, but without practical strategies, the change is incomplete. The Cost of Fear will show us how we can make safety choices that expand our worlds and contribute to the fight for social justice.

“Intriguing . . . This is sure to stir debate.”
—Publishers Weekly

“Stone provides a practical, deeply needed resource that expands rather than diminishes the world for women.”
—Booklist

“The Cost of Fear delivers a compelling critique of the shortcomings of conventional safety practices. Through meticulous evidence-based research and personal stories, Stone suggests more effective strategies for eliminating gender-based violence.”
—Wendy Rouse, author of Her Own Hero

“Meg Stone offers her incredible knowledge with love and compassion, an essential guide for resistance-based self-defense training. Drawing from her decades-long experience, Stone empowers you to build mental resilience and vital techniques for developing situational awareness to defuse gender-based violence quickly for your safety. The Cost of Fear is a must-read for people of all genders and ages, regardless of their fitness and experience levels.”
—Rev. Irene Monroe, co-host of All Rev’d Up on Boston Public Radio

“Meg Stone has written a powerful, accessible, and devastatingly acute analysis of the pervasiveness of gender-based violence and why our efforts to prevent it have failed, packed with expert insight drawn from her decades-long career and practical tips to empower women and others who are targeted. The Cost of Fear moved me, enraged me, and educated me. I don’t think I’ll ever stop thinking about it. I wish this book weren’t necessary. But until we live in a better world, get this book.”
—Alex Marzano-Lesnevich, author of The Fact of a Body

“In The Cost of Fear, Meg Stone weaves together stories—from the individual to the organizational—and extensive research to offer a comprehensive understanding of the problem of gender-based violence. She makes a clear, compelling case for safety through resistance to both protect individuals and change society. Valuable for everyone from policy-makers to individuals wanting to increase their safety, this book can change the world.”
—Lauren R. Taylor, founder-director of Defend Yourself

Meg Stone is the Executive Director of IMPACT Boston, an abuse prevention and empowerment self-defense organization. Her writing has been published in Huffington Post, Newsweek, Washington Post, Boston Globe, Dame, and Ms. She has received numerous awards for her work over the past 30 years. Meg lives in Cambridge, MA, with her partner Mal and a shockingly large collection of musical theatre cast albums.

Meg Stone View titles by Meg Stone

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• Seychelles

• Sierra Leone

• Singapore

• Sint Maarten

• Slovakia

• Slovenia

• Solomon Islands

• Somalia

• South Africa

• South Korea

• South Sudan

• Spain

• Sri Lanka

• St Barthelemy

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Introduction: Scared and Powerful

PART 1: WHAT HOLDS US BACK

CHAPTER 1
Monumental, Unsatisfying Victories

CHAPTER 2
The Cost of Fear

CHAPTER 3
How Not to Get Strangled by Your Ponytail

CHAPTER 4
Bad People Do Bad Things

CHAPTER 5
Compliance Breeds Abuse

PART 2: WHAT WORKS

CHAPTER 6
Not Overreacting

CHAPTER 7
The Evidence and Its Discontents

PART 3: WHAT MOVES US FORWARD

CHAPTER 8
Resisting Racism

CHAPTER 9
Strengthening Activism

CHAPTER 10
Embracing Resistance

CHAPTER 11
So, What Should I Do? What Should I Tell My Daughter?

Notes

About

Praise

Author

Meg Stone View titles by Meg Stone

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Available for sale exclusive:

• Afghanistan

• Aland Islands

• Albania

• Algeria

• Andorra

• Angola

• Anguilla

• Antarctica

• Antigua/Barbuda

• Argentina

• Armenia

• Aruba

• Australia

• Austria

• Azerbaijan

• Bahamas

• Bahrain

• Bangladesh

• Barbados

• Belarus

• Belgium

• Belize

• Benin

• Bermuda

• Bhutan

• Bolivia

• Bonaire, Saba

• Bosnia Herzeg.

• Botswana

• Bouvet Island

• Brazil

• Brit.Ind.Oc.Ter

• Brit.Virgin Is.

• Brunei

• Bulgaria

• Burkina Faso

• Burundi

• Cambodia

• Cameroon

• Canada

• Cape Verde

• Cayman Islands

• Centr.Afr.Rep.

• Chad

• Chile

• China

• Christmas Islnd

• Cocos Islands

• Colombia

• Comoro Is.

• Congo

• Cook Islands

• Costa Rica

• Croatia

• Cuba

• Curacao

• Cyprus

• Czech Republic

• Dem. Rep. Congo

• Denmark

• Djibouti

• Dominica

• Dominican Rep.

• Ecuador

• Egypt

• El Salvador

• Equatorial Gui.

• Eritrea

• Estonia

• Ethiopia

• Falkland Islnds

• Faroe Islands

• Fiji

• Finland

• France

• Fren.Polynesia

• French Guinea

• Gabon

• Gambia

• Georgia

• Germany

• Ghana

• Gibraltar

• Greece

• Greenland

• Grenada

• Guadeloupe

• Guam

• Guatemala

• Guernsey

• Guinea Republic

• Guinea-Bissau

• Guyana

• Haiti

• Heard/McDon.Isl

• Honduras

• Hong Kong

• Hungary

• Iceland

• India

• Indonesia

• Iran

• Iraq

• Ireland

• Isle of Man

• Israel

• Italy

• Ivory Coast

• Jamaica

• Japan

• Jersey

• Jordan

• Kazakhstan

• Kenya

• Kiribati

• Kuwait

• Kyrgyzstan

• Laos

• Latvia

• Lebanon

• Lesotho

• Liberia

• Libya

• Liechtenstein

• Lithuania

• Luxembourg

• Macau

• Macedonia

• Madagascar

• Malawi

• Malaysia

• Maldives

• Mali

• Malta

• Marshall island

• Martinique

• Mauritania

• Mauritius

• Mayotte

• Mexico

• Micronesia

• Minor Outl.Ins.

• Moldavia

• Monaco

• Mongolia

• Montenegro

• Montserrat

• Morocco

• Mozambique

• Myanmar

• Namibia

• Nauru

• Nepal

• Netherlands

• New Caledonia

• New Zealand

• Nicaragua

• Niger

• Nigeria

• Niue

• Norfolk Island

• North Korea

• North Mariana

• Norway

• Oman

• Pakistan

• Palau

• Palestinian Ter

• Panama

• PapuaNewGuinea

• Paraguay

• Peru

• Philippines

• Pitcairn Islnds

• Poland

• Portugal

• Puerto Rico

• Qatar

• Reunion Island

• Romania

• Russian Fed.

• Rwanda

• S. Sandwich Ins

• Saint Martin

• Samoa,American

• San Marino

• SaoTome Princip

• Saudi Arabia

• Senegal

• Serbia

• Seychelles

• Sierra Leone

• Singapore

• Sint Maarten

• Slovakia

• Slovenia

• Solomon Islands

• Somalia

• South Africa

• South Korea

• South Sudan

• Spain

• Sri Lanka

• St Barthelemy

• St. Helena

• St. Lucia

• St. Vincent

• St.Chr.,Nevis

• St.Pier,Miquel.

• Sth Terr. Franc

• Sudan

• Suriname

• Svalbard

• Swaziland

• Sweden

• Switzerland

• Syria

• Tadschikistan

• Taiwan

• Tanzania

• Thailand

• Timor-Leste

• Togo

• Tokelau Islands

• Tonga

• Trinidad,Tobago

• Tunisia

• Turkey

• Turkmenistan

• Turks&Caicos Is

• Tuvalu

• US Virgin Is.

• USA

• Uganda

• Ukraine

• Unit.Arab Emir.

• United Kingdom

• Uruguay

• Uzbekistan

• Vanuatu

• Vatican City

• Venezuela

• Vietnam

• Wallis,Futuna

• West Saharan

• Western Samoa

• Yemen

• Zambia

• Zimbabwe

The Cost of Fear

Why Most Safety Advice Is Sexist and How We Can Stop Gender-Based Violence

About

Praise

Author

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Table of Contents

Additional formats

Other Books by this Author

About International Sales USA

Penguin Random House

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The Cost of Fear

Why Most Safety Advice Is Sexist and How We Can Stop Gender-Based Violence

About

Praise

Author

Rights

Table of Contents

Additional formats

Other Books by this Author

Our Mission Statement

About International Sales USA

Penguin Random House